Heavy Heart...

This week has been a struggle for me. I want our baby back from Heaven. I want questions answered. I want to understand. I want to know why. Lately babies are more precious to me and I know it's because it's getting close to the one year anniversary of our miscarriage. Even Nathan being in school makes me sad this week...he's getting so big so fast. And I love every minute of him getting older...each day is more fun...but I just don't want this part of our life to be over. Please don't get me wrong, I'm so blessed with this beautiful boy laying here next to me all cuddled in...but I just feel like I have room to give even more by having another one. Thank God for dogs too...Toby heard my tears and has been licking all of them away - what a BIG sweetie. Jasper came up to my face too with a bone in his mouth like he was willing to share if I would quit being sad. Ok, just writing that makes me feel a little better. Just minutes ago, I took this picture of Nathan and it too makes me feel better.And, thanks for listening! I just needed to get that off of my chest and remind myself how lucky I truly am.